The Quality of Our Relationships Reflects the Quality of Our Lives (2)


The above quote is one of my favourites by Ester Perel.

I asked Sarah Zuniga about her thoughts about relationships. You can also find more information about her message here:

“My name is Sarah Zuniga creator of Simplicity Magnified. I am a wife and a fur mom of two. I enjoy spending quality time with family and friends.

I enjoy a deep conversation with over some strong coffee. As I’ve grown older, relationships have become so much more important to me than ever before.

I want to share ideas and tips on how to cherish and grow in relationships that we are all in starting today. 

The time I spend with my husband is never enough. Never enough in the sense of our phones being in our faces more than half the time. That upsets me and makes me want to go back to the days where he and I would spend hours on the phone talking about anything and everything.
I definitely feel like we along with so many other people could be more intentional about their relationships with their spouse or any other person they are in a relationship with. 

I feel like my husband doesn’t fully understand what I’m feeling half the time only because he’s growing in the department of being more aware of how I’m feeling.
I think this stems from a selfish mindset in his past relationships, and my job as his wife is to be patient and not take it personally. He’s still learning. Not to say he doesn’t know how I feeling, just a majority of the time he doesn’t, and even if he does, it is hard for him to figure out how to deal with it.

I definitely find it to be important to divvy up chores, however, I am a stay at home wife and my husband works hard in the sun all day. Typically what I do, is on the weekends, I ask him to help with cleaning up after our meals together or throwing in a load of laundry for me to get later.
I think its a matter of teamwork in order to get the necessary tasks done so we can live comfortably. 

Seeing that my husband works pretty much all day, we spend a lot of time together. So I don’t feel like I need a lot of alone time. However, if I have been around a lot of people for a while, I do absolutely need alone time to recharge.

I love being outdoors, so I think the thing I would love to spend my day doing would be taking a hike or going to a park to just relax and hang out together. 

I prefer to stay in on most weekends. I am not much of a social butterfly, so staying home and watching movies and eating pizza is pretty ideal. I am a homebody by all means.
If I am feeling like getting outside, it would probably be something spontaneous like a bike ride at night or a batting cage session.

I absolutely believe my husband and I share the same values. I have found that some things are either changing or we are getting to a point in our marriage where values are changing, and we are bouncing ideas off of each other. So I think that is always evolving.

I think that finances should definitely be together. I married him and he married me. We went from being two single people to a joined married couple. I think l everything should become joined to avoid any misunderstandings, and questions about where what money went where and why. It’s also a great way to learn to do things together and figure them out together.
Marriage is a whole learning process and with finances being one of the top reasons for divorce, why wouldn’t that be something to join together. It’s a bonding experience if it’s done right.

I would love to live in the mountains or in the middle of a forest. To be one with nature and less “city” is ideal.

The kind if vacation I would enjoy most would be going somewhere new and experiencing new things. Wandering and exploring different places is all I really look forward to on vacations.

I do want kids. We are at a point in our “trying ” where we are leaving it up to God. He knows when the best time is for us to have a child. And if not, we’ll go from there. 

I think physical chemistry is important to a certain extent. It is definitely not everything but there has to be some sort of attraction to the person you plan to build a life with.

Something homemade and well thought out would be the best gift my spouse could give me.

I have been out of the country once for a missions trip. Other than that, when I think about it, I get anxiety. I’m not sure why other than the fact that it’s not MY country. I would love to experience being out of the country but not sure if it would happen any time soon. 

The main way I show affection is by being of service to whoever I am showing love. 

Mine and my husband’s relationship with God through Jesus is the focal point of our marriage. Without Him, I’m not sure how our marriage would stay strong.

I don’t think there is anything specific that my spouse or I say to resolve an argument. We will typically disagree and then let it settle and then come back outside of emotions and speak logically. Then we try to figure out a way to avoid the same disagreement in the future.
Some disagreements don’t always get resolved but we figure out how to hear each other out at the end of the conversations.

As I’ve grown older, physical fitness has become something that is quite important now. The ability to take care of the body, mind and soul is a blessing and if we overlook that, then not only are we personally affected but so are those around us.
I want to be able to play and run with my nephew and that can only be done if I am taking care of my health. So it’s becoming more important as the years pass.

I have learned that just being there for my spouse when he’s sad is enough.

When I am shown that I matter and I am important is when I still feel the most loved.

I feel like my voice is not being heard, and I feel demeaned when I am interrupted.

I feel like my exes were lessons learned, and I try not to think of the person, but only the lesson.

When I am down or depressed I want to be reminded of my importance, that my feelings are valid, but also encouragement to come out of being down.

If I could do anything for work and not worry about money I would find out what people need help with the most and do what I can to help them with those big or small tasks.

My relationship with my dad is very open and at times emotional. My relationship with my mom is very instructional and direct.

I do not like being the centre of attention I typically will stand back and observe and figure out where I would most likely be comfortable and usually spend know the rest of my time in that comfortable spot.

I think the way that I feel towards my spouse’s ex-girlfriends is grateful. I think that he is a different person after those relationships and he learned a lot from those relationships so, in essence, they helped to shape him and change him to be the man I know today.

I like to spend my free time thinking of ways to bless other people and make them smile.”
Thank you for reading!
The Quality Of Our Relationships Determine The Quality Of Our Lives. Ester Perel.
As a women’s holistic relationship coach I completely agree that our relationships are so important to our general wellness and wellbeing. This is why we can be so cautious. I provide 1:1 online coaching services for women who would like to receive support in this way. Contact me: [email protected]
I believe it is so fascinating to hear about different people and their thoughts, feelings and behaviour around relationships. Not only romantic relationships but all the important relationships in life.
By sharing our personal experiences we can learn so much and realise we are not alone.
By answering questions about relationships in this way, much like journaling prompts we can learn so much about ourselves.
Would you like to try it too? It provides so much insight and self-awareness which you can use for your own relationships. It is a therapy for your soul!
Would you like to answer some questions about the relationships in your life? Email me, Niomi: [email protected]

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